ZOE: But I feel like want to give the chance of a conversation, and if they’re a snooze then I can make that decision. Sometimes it’s hard to tell from a profile.

ZOE: But if I’m sitting at home doing nothing, they seem decent enough and the bar is within 15 minutes of my apartment, I always figure I may as well go, have a drink, and see if they’re the love of my life

Do you block people when this goes on too long without making plans to meet up? Or if the conversation naturally dies down and doesnt seem to be going anywhere? Or is that considered harsh?

ZOE: I don’t block but I’ll unmatch them-it stresses me out to have a bunch of guys sitting in a conversation list that I should respond to but don’t want to.

ERIN: Yes, getting “good morning” texts kicks in my codependence. I feel bad if I don’t respond, then I resent them for taking up my time. Blocking or unmatching seems kinder for my personal neuroses, but it all feels kind of wrong.

TAMIM: senior dating sites If it goes on for too long without them making a move I’ll usually try to start giving short answers and then say something like, “Let me know when you wanna get a drink,” and not respond to anything thats not to make plans. The more seasoned of a veteran you become the less you care, I think.

ZOE: I think you need to do what works for you in that sense-if you want to block someone, block ’em.

ERIN: So what about the opposite thing: people who say “lets go out tonight” when youve only exchanged like two messages? Intuitively it just didnt feel right to me…is this a thing? Or a crazy red flag?

ZOE: I think that could go either way. I’ve had great first dates where it was like, “Let’s be spontaneous and not be pen pals.” But also terrible ones.

TAMIM: Personally someone asking to hang day-of is always a red flag for me. There are so many things I need to do beforehand-stalk thoroughly on the internet, figure out what Im going to be wearing, get in the right mindset.

RACHEL: Yeah. Tbh I prefer talking for a bit before meeting IRL because otherwise it could be a really bad date. I dont like wasting my time on people who could be totally not my type.

ZOE: I just hate feeling like I wasted a week of my life texting a guy, getting excited about him, and then meeting and he’s a letdown. The more I talk to people the more I build them up in my head.

TAMIM: I try to text just enough that I can tell if they have a sense of humor or if they’re like a gremlin human.

I think the feeling bad might have to do with you being new to internet dating

ERIN: To Tamim’s “stalking” point: Another weird thing is theres very little info about the person on these profiles. What do you always find out before agreeing to meet up with someone?

TAMIM: Google search doesnt do much for me but you can usually use reverse engineering to find them on social media. If you have a first name and then one additional tidbit of information you can usually find them on Facebook. Like where they went to school or something like that.

RACHEL: Twitter, though, can be a bad one. You can find out they’re really passionate about defending R.Kelly or something.